Mary Diane Steltenkamp, an extraordinary friend and caregiver to the clergy of the Archdiocese of Oklahoma City, is celebrating her friendships and successes as she prepares for retirement this month.
“I am grateful for the care, expertise and sacrifice of Mary Diane in her service to the archdiocese as our Priest Nurse,” Archbishop Coakley said. “Mary Diane loves priests. She brought comfort and laughter to many of our priests, helping them to navigate important health decisions and even to prepare for the end of their earthly life. She will be missed.”
Since 2013, she has been the archdiocesan nurse, helping to comfort more than 100 priests as they face both minor and major health challenges. The longtime member of Saint Eugene Catholic Church in Oklahoma City was the first to lead the nursing program for the archdiocese.
"I knew I wanted to be the one to start this program," she said. "So many of our priests would otherwise have to deal with these decisions by themselves."
Her duties included, but weren’t limited to, making sure clergy had access to vaccines, monitoring of vitals and assisting with health advice.
One of the priests who knew she would be perfect for the job is Father Scott Boeckman, now at Conception Seminary College in Missouri.
"Everyone's life is filled with fears, especially when we are sick," Father Boeckman said. "Mary Diane helped us to alleviate those fears. We knew we could count on her. She was our healing balm."
Steltenkamp also communicated with the family of clergy and offered her nursing opinions on various surgeries or medications physicians recommended. Her knowledge came with a wealth of nursing experience and an urge to help others.
That urge dates back to her time as a high school student at Bishop McGuinness Catholic High School, where she graduated in 1963. She wanted to help her family's finances and was prepared to apply for a job as a nurse's aide at Saint Anthony Hospital.
Her first hurdle to a career that would span decades was finding a parking place so she could go in and apply. Saint Anthony Hospital, being downtown, had limited parking spaces. She circled the lot a few times before finally saying a prayer.
"I said 'God if you want me to do this job please let me have a parking place,'" she recalled. Almost on cue, she spotted a car leaving and parked. That event started a special calling, which eventually would touch almost every priest's life in the archdiocese.
Her Catholic faith began in childhood and she shudders to think where she'd be today without her deep faith. She first came to Oklahoma City at age 9. Her dad had been transferred from Kentucky.
"We thought we would go back in a year's time. We never did."
The family eventually grew to two sisters and three brothers.
She went to grade school at Christ the King and initially began nursing studies at Saint Anthony Hospital and later Saint Gregory's in 1965.
"We would take a bus to Saint Gregory's at 7:30 a.m. and get home at 6 p.m.," she recalled.
Later, her studies continued at Saint Anthony. She was offered free room and board, providing she agreed to work for the hospital for two years. She did. Upon graduation, she worked in the intensive care unit. Years later she'd be a supervisor with the newly established dialysis unit.
Along the way, others urged her to take on different assignments in nursing.
"I don't remember having a formal job interview," she recalled. "People would just say you'd be good at this or that. I think it was God's way of speaking to me."
At every step, her Catholic faith was never far from her. She played the organ for years at Saint Eugene. She applied to be a nun, but the order believed her family, going through personal challenges, needed her more. The nurse credits counselors at McGuinness for helping her through challenging times.
Although her dialysis work provided a good salary and great opportunity to retire at a younger age, she opted to give back. In 1997, she joined Catholic Charities and established the parish nursing ministry.
In 2013, she considered retirement only to be lured back by starting the archdiocesan nurse program.
It has been a rich ministry for Steltenkamp as she has traveled to virtually every parish. When priests get together for regular meetings, she would set up a blood pressure station. Doing those tests gave her a chance to offer friendship and guidance.
She has been at the side of 16 priests as they passed, offering comfort in their final days.
Father Boeckman knows how valuable she has been.
"Each priest she ministered to knew that they could trust her completely and that her heart was involved, meaning love," he said.
Although she'll be retiring, she plans to continue work with a spiritual formation program.
"Mary Diane proved to be the quintessential priest's nurse," Father Boeckman said. "The reason is that she was all in."
Steve Gust is a freelance writer for the Sooner Catholic.