Ask a Priest

Q: I know we are all called to pray for vocations to the priesthood. As lay people, is it proper to suggest to a young man who is not a family member that maybe he should consider it? And if so, what would that conversation look like?

Anonymous

A: This is a great question to be asking! One of Archbishop Coakley’s goals for our archdiocese is to foster a culture of vocation where it is natural and universal for every young Catholic woman or man to consider a religious vocation. We are all invited to build this culture alongside our archbishop. This, of course, means praying fervently for the Lord of the harvest to send out workers for his harvest. But as you indicate, it also means listening to the Holy Spirit respond to our prayer by moving our hearts when we see particularly devout young people and for some reason connect them in our minds with a religious vocation.
When this connection happens – seeing someone who would make a good priest or religious sister – it would be entirely appropriate to approach them and simply say, “I’ve noticed _____ about you, and that makes me want to encourage you to consider if God might be calling you to be a priest/religious sister.”

I think it is good to make it personal and concrete by mentioning what it is about them that makes you connect them with a possible religious vocation. (i.e. – I notice how you spend time praying after Mass -or- I notice how you make frequent visits to the Blessed Sacrament -or- I notice how you are especially close to Our Lady). It would also be good to avoid asking them to disclose personal discernment or vocational information to you. (i.e. – Have you thought about being a priest/sister?) Don’t put them on the spot to open up about the deepest parts of their heart. You can simply encourage them to discern the possibility. If they want to offer that information, they can.

Every year the Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate at Georgetown University sends out a survey of those ordained as priests in the US. The young men being ordained in 2024 stated that 51% had participated in their parish youth group before entering seminary, 71% had served as altar boys in their parishes, 89% had been personally encouraged by someone to consider a vocation to the priesthood, and 44% report that that person was someone they shared no relationship with other than being fellow parishioners with them! This means that almost one out of two men who were ordained this year were encouraged to consider the priesthood by someone in their parish.

The simple, humble, and kind suggestion of a vocation to the priesthood is strongly correlated to a man eventually arriving at ordination. So please do encourage young people at your parish to discern and let them know you see priestly/religious qualities in them. If you see something, say something!

When looking for someone to encourage to discern a religious vocation, please don’t look for someone who has nothing else going for them, someone who doesn’t quite fit it with their peers, someone who isn’t interested in dating. None of these are signs of a religious vocation.

Instead look for someone who is in love with Jesus, who loves the Church, who loves the Blessed Mother and has a disposition to serve others. Remember, religious vocations develop within parishes and families, and don’t fall out of the sky. We are all able to cooperate with the Lord to call and support future priests and religious.

Father Jerome Krug
Associate Pastor, Saint Eugene Catholic Church, Oklahoma City
Chaplain, Mount Saint Mary Catholic High School
Assistant vocation director, Archdiocese of Oklahoma City